Dream

I dream often that I am back in school, that some technicality has forced me to start the dreaded process all over again. Toward the end, I hated school. Going back would be nothing but misery.

Last night I dreamed of high school. Except that the setting was actually my middle school, and our mascot was that of my university - the Golden Hurricane. In the dream, we were forced, as we so often were, to attend a pep rally. I was self-conscious in high school, and my dream self reverted to that. I was never a cheerer in high school. I was the lame kid who tried to read a book amidst all the noise. I stood, dressed in black, close to the stage on which the president (?) of our high school was seated.

I remember a great deal of noise, and even more fog, as my dream-self tried to balance holding a backpack, a ball cap, and a chewed-on styrofoam cup filled with Dr. Pepper that held some significance to the rowdy, loyal crowd. A kid named Ernie had given it to me - the styrofoam cup I mean - as a sign that he trusted my faith in the Golden Hurricane. I believe this shows how much importance I placed in the tokens of allegiance to our school and mascot. A marble seal we weren't supposed to step on and a drum line we were never allowed to insult reduced themselves down to a dirty styrofoam cup half full of a drink I haven't tasted in years.

Oddly, I took care of that cup in my dream. I didn't want to be seen as the one who cursed the team with bad luck. I stumbled down iron stairs in tall heels as people watched the cup reverently. When I'd reached the bottom, I looked for friends to spend time with after school.

I found my friend Stephanie - she wanted to go to the bars (an odd desire for an 18 year old with no fake ID). I also found my friend Megan, who, strangely, did not go to high school with me. She wasn't sure what her plans were. Then I found Brettin. She wanted to go home and eat a peanut butter sandwich. I've known Brettin since we were five. She has always detested peanut butter.

I finally gave up on finding something to do and resigned myself to going home. When I left the crowds behind, I threw that styrofoam cup in the trash.

That isn't all of the dream of course. There were other strange details, like the fact that I was in an art classroom fit for 1st graders, and the president of the school gave me a newspaper that I was forced to wear on my head. The headline read something about our school - something of which he was very proud. People begged me for that newspaper, and because it seemed valuable, I, of course, wanted to keep it.

Anyone who knows me will tell you I have the strangest dreams. This was not the most strange, but it was very vivid to say the least.